I think so many of us are just floundering about, dating people, falling for people – usually a new person every year or so, give or take. We turn the corner at the end of the year and think “maybe this is the year.” Then it’s the next January, and it wasn’t. And it feels like a failure, like the year was a waste. What is there to show for it after all?

But maybe the built-up idea is a waste, not the year spent on that idea. I think we all know deep down in our hearts what is best for us and what’s not – but we still choose to live this way. We choose to focus on the difficulties of waiting or being alone rather than the benefits of it. I do this almost daily. It’s the easiest thing, but not the best thing.

So here’s to dwelling on the deeper things, the more important and valuable parts of this relatively awkward stage of life we’re in. Here’s to not making “maybe this is the year” our favourite depressing phrase of the season – but instead greeting the coming year with a more open mind and lighter heart. Here’s to not taking ourselves so seriously, to valuing time with quality people more, and to taking away more positive things from relationships than negative, even if they don’t go where we originally wanted them to go.



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